How an introvert becomes a speaker
/In a word, awkwardly.
You can probably guess the other answer: by being scared & doing it anyway.
I gave my first speech years ago and my only memory is hiding in a bathroom stall until the moment I had to be onstage, afraid I might throw up the whole time. I practiced my five-minute speech for hours in advance, channeling what I believe is a similar process for firefighters. If you memorize the content to the point of it becoming second nature, you can go through the motions (in my case, talk coherently) while freaking out on the inside.
After probably 100 speeches since then, it still feels like an out of body experience. I’m still an introvert more comfortable in the audience than in front of it. This photo was from last week and you can tell by my clenched smile how tough it still feels sometimes.
What propels me back to the podium, though, is having something to say.
Something that’s bigger than me and that feels in service of others. That we can be ourselves and be braver together. If I believe someone in the audience may need to hear that message on the day I’m standing in front of them, how could I not awkwardly get back up there?
What propels YOU through your own fear, discomfort and awkwardness?
You’ve heard before that the best things in life are often on the other side of those. We learn and grow, and we achieve more than we ever thought possible. Pushing further each time.
It’s also easier to be brave when you do it for someone else. Trust me that whatever feels scary, uncomfortable or awkward for you will inspire others more than you can imagine.
For instance, someone in the audience at that first speech applied to give her first speech and another person signed up for dance lessons after hearing me say, “I’m on stage tonight because I’m scared & doing it anyway!”
Someone else needs to see you be brave.
If you’re a fellow introvert wondering how to be a speaker, here’s my method:
Apply for a speech before thinking twice about it.
Create a detailed outline and memorize it, especially your first and last lines and the transitions between your points. That way if you get flustered, you can keep going.
Determine when to pause for effect during your speech so you can practice that too.
Test your memory of the speech in the shower and while driving your car.
Wear the same shoes you’ll have on that day in advance so you know you’ll be comfortable.
Imagine people staring at you. Basically, freak yourself out now so you freak out less later.
If at all possible, see the space you’ll be in before anyone arrives.
Hide before and after giving the speech if necessary. Do what you need to do.
Go in with a goal—such as help one person—and notice when it happens.
Have someone kind and thoughtful who you trust give you feedback two days later.
I have many more suggestions, but that should get you started. Now go sign up for a speech!
If you’re propelled to be brave in other ways, consider how these tips can apply there too. Or comment below and let’s brainstorm.
You know what they say…awkwardness loves company!
