You're doing your best

It’s true.

When I posted this friendly reminder on Instagram, I added, “This is a time when a solid B is gonna have to do for us A students, and that’s more than okay.”

How do I know you’re doing your best?

First, because everyone is.

We can only do what we are capable of in each moment, which is why sometimes you knock it out of the park and others you inch across the floor. The same is true for everyone else, including those who haven’t figured out social distancing yet or who have opposing political ideologies to you. We are all doing our best through this unprecedented time, and so the more patient we can be, the better we’ll all be for it.

Second, I’m almost positive you’re the only one who thinks you could do more than what you’re already doing right now.

As over-functioners (thanks to Brené Brown’s new podcast for naming the desire to control in the midst of uncertainty) and A students, our mediocre days still exceed expectations.

If your response is, “but I could be doing so much more,” that is a sign to take your own expectations down a notch. I’ve had more than one conversation with clients lately about doing 80%. If you aim for 80% of your energy expended, your to-do’s accomplished and your goals reached, you are still a rock star.

Given all that’s happening, I’d say you’re golden aiming for 65%.

In addition to trusting and believing you're doing your best, please know you’re not alone. 

It can feel lonely trying to figure out how to shift your work to stay relevant, and determine who will buy from you or hire you now. The right next step is even more unclear, and your options could change again tomorrow. 

I’d love to help.

I’ve been asked to offer Coaching Sessions to navigate the changes to your work and businesses (and your roller coaster of feelings about these changes) through the pandemic. If you think you may want one, let’s get on the phone to see if it fits your needs.

If you’d rather speak with an intimate circle of others right where you are and hear what they’re doing, we can make that happen too.

I’m organizing a Mastermind & Accountability Circle that begins the week of April 20 for womxn in business wanting to lean on and learn from one another. Brainstorming solutions, sharing resources and providing moral support to move through fear, overwhelm and everything else.

We always get more done by working together, now especially.

If either of these options sound like what you need, let’s talk to see which is the right fit.

I’m here, and I believe so much in you.

Now, do less okay? And believe it’s more than enough.

How’s your “new normal”?

If you’re like me, it really depends on the moment.

Sometimes I take my own advice from two weeks ago and brush my teeth, drink water, and text my mom a funny joke to encourage her not to walk around Rite Aid even though she’s bored.

At other times, today for instance, I cried and broke out in hives before noon.

Based on what I’m seeing from others on social media and feeling in my own body, these are stages of grief. Nice that Harvard Business Review agrees. We are collectively grieving change on a level most of us were unprepared for and without an end in sight.

On top of that is having to hold it together for others.

If you let yourself, you can likely feel the burden of other people depending on you for stability, a sense of calm and order, being their shoulder to cry on.

That’s a lot, especially if you don’t have a shoulder for your crying.

As an A student, this time may also bring out your superpowers. You could excel at being thrown into action, managing schedules, comforting loved ones, and working out to one of the many new online classes.

If you’re firing on all cylinders, go you! And if in the quiet moments you also break out in hives, you’re not alone. If you want to talk through either, my calendar is still open for Pep Talks.

More support when you need it:

1) Brave the discomfort. Brené Brown has a new podcast and I already listened to the first episode twice because it’s about this pandemic being a FFT — “F-ing First Time” — for all of us. There’s a relief in naming our collective new territory plus she also offers concrete steps to move through it.

2) Make a to-do list. The first thing that went out the window when changes started? My to-do list. The thing that will save my sanity, and keep me positive and productive? You guessed it. No doubt your to-do list is different in a lot of ways than a month ago, so if you haven’t already (go A students!) make a new one. Decorate it special, choose a new font. The version I offer my mailing list might help.

3) Join me for a Lunch Break on Instagram this Wednesday at 1pm ET. I’m speaking with Stella Yoon of Hudson River Exchange about how we’re navigating this new normal as business owners and what might help you too. Follow her to see when we go live.

4) Choose hope. I listened to a meditation by Oprah and Deepak Chopra on Hope in Uncertain Times, and she quoted Maya Angelou: “Hope and fear can’t occupy the same place. Invite one to stay.” You might need to re-invite hope several times a day, treating it as a form of meditation: choosing hope (for your family, business, health and community), and when your mind wanders choosing hope all over again.

I believe so much in you, and what’s possible when we lean on each other.