Create a Life You Love, Part 1
/Your dream life is becoming clearer all the time, even if you're not sure yet how to get there from here. That's what your fellow Life-Lovers & Simply Leapers (please click over and join our new private Facebook community!) are saying as they share the breaking points that inspired them to step boldly in a new direction.
You know what else I'm hearing from them? Hope. They find reasons to celebrate the ride while they are working through the details.
If you feel similarly, you may be surprised by how well the following activity clarifies your vision of the future.
In the next few days, I'll share tips to Create a Life You Love that you can implement immediately. It's part of the sneak peek into my new program, Facing 40, that launches at the end of the month.
Here's the first...
Figure out what you want
"What you want" is also your "purpose," but I get all itchy when I hear that word as if I have to get it right. If you like "purpose," then that's what we are talking about. If you prefer "figure out what you want/who you are/what you're meant to do" - same same for this exercise.
You are here for a reason. You want to know that what you do matters, and that your life has meaning.
Not knowing your What You Want can make decisions hard. If you should change careers, if you should move, if you should break up with that perfectly decent person who you haven't been sure about for a while.
When you really, really know Who You Are, these decisions get easier to make, and will come to matter less. You are you, and no matter what happens next, you are still you.
What is the best compliment you have ever received?
The kind that took your breath away.
Recently a good friend put his hand on my arm after dinner, and said, "Lauree, you are a writer. You have to keep writing. It's what you are meant to do."
I cried in the restaurant. Not pretty-cry either.
I already knew I liked writing, but when he spoke it was as if I was hearing it for the first time. His words reached into my soul.
Sometimes other people can see us better than we see ourselves.
When a compliment takes your breath away, that is your body saying Yes! I want this!
It can feel scary, daunting, and also comforting and life-affirming. All good signs.
Regular ol' compliments are helpful, too.
If you listen carefully to what you are being thanked/valued/loved for every day, you will know better Who You Are and are meant to be. This works for everyone, in every situation.
Here's what I mean:
Say you're an accountant. You have a pretty good handle on what you do, and what customers receive by working with you.
More than getting their taxes filed on time, I bet if asked your customers would talk about your reassuring smile. Your convenient hours so that they can meet you on Saturday mornings instead of feeling stressed about missing work in the middle of the day. How easy you make a process that seems anything but when their eyes glaze over staring at TurboTax.
A great accountant can be an oasis. [I know, I have worked with one! Thanks, Herb!]
These compliments are unique to who is being complimented. Not everyone's smile is "reassuring." And believe me that not every accountant is an oasis!
Who does everyone else see when they see you?
When people thank you for something that is so naturally you, you may take it for granted. How could that be special? That was easy!
To you it was, to someone else it was so special they went out of their way to thank you for it, brought it up a second time in conversation...and will Pay You For It. I pay an accountant for being an oasis. Who wouldn't?!
Side note: Another approach to figuring out Who You Are is my favorite personality test. Take the Strengthsfinder assessment online, and find out your Top 5 strengths for free. [I'm not affiliated with it at all, I just really love it.]
[box] Your assignment!
1) Tell me: What is the best compliment you've ever received?
What did someone thank you for that made a voice inside you call out: Yes!!!?
That's the one I want to know. Please share it in my new private Facebook Group for subscribers only.
I'm excited to hear how awesome You Are!
2) Collect the other compliments too.
Pay attention to the specific words people use, and write them down in one place so you can look for patterns. What keeps getting brought up? What do you brush aside for being "too easy"? Maybe it is only easy for you!
3) Notice how these compliments contribute to Who You Are in the world.
Start choosing to be that person more often. Walk around as if You Are that person. Put those qualities at the top of your resume...you get the picture.
4) Remember.
Your life can be this natural, effortless. You can be this person every day no matter what you are doing or where you are. Which is why you're starting right now. [/box]
I promise that this exercise will allow the Life You Love to happen all around you.
If everyone else already sees the real you, what are you waiting for? It's time to Be You more than you ever have before!
Stay tuned for more tips to Create a Life You Love coming soon, including how to get there from here. Oh and a free call on Monday, Oct 19 at 8pm ET (details coming soon).