You know what works for you

Remember last month when we checked in with each other?

It seems forever ago to me too, and now there’s a war weighing on us.

What I heard from you back then:

  • You feel overwhelmed by requirements on your already-limited time

  • Most are similarly stuck in the deep pit of their email inboxes, and

  • There’s a mutual longing to be reminded of how much we’re already getting right.

So I’m coming to you today with a reminder of just that. Specifically:

  1. You know what works for you.

  2. It doesn’t have to work for anyone else for it to be a successful strategy for you.

As A students it can be really easy to look externally for rules, and then judge ourselves on how well (or not) we follow them.

I get it. External rules to live, work, eat and sleep by are comforting in a way, like when they were listed on the board in third grade. But it’s a slippery slope between Motivation and Comparison, and the latter is downright debilitating.

If you trusted you knew what works best for you, your work, your personal life and time commitments, what would you do? What would you not do?

My guess is you would do a lot of the same things you’ve already been doing but you Would Feel Less Bad About It. Which leads to the second reminder: your way may seem different, and different isn’t wrong. It may be tough sometimes to listen inside for the answer, or to see what you’re already doing, feeling and thinking as right-for-you without any outside confirmation. But it’s true. You are already right and get a gold star.

For the next week, try on the mantra: I know what works for me.

Use it in conversation with loved ones who ask what you’re up to, and in conversation with yourself when you’re figuring out what to do next.

You already know and you don’t have to prove it or explain it, even to yourself.

You are soo right.

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The only people you need to impress

Caught in the mental loop of comparison?

It happens to the best of us. What starts innocently with liking pet photos posted by friends moments later becomes obsessing about thigh gap and self-worth.

You’ve heard it before — don’t compare yourself to anyone else — but this image by Mari Andrew refocuses our attention.

If you’re gonna worry about what people think, focus on these two.

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The younger and older versions of yourself decide your life has been worthwhile.

You’ve been a good person, tried your best, made a difference, loved fully, laughed openly, and given with all your heart. If these two are satisfied, you should be too.

What makes your 5-year-old and 85-year-old selves proud?

What do they boast to their friends about you? Share in comments below.

Surprising, isn’t it, what’s important to them and what doesn’t matter at all. Or maybe it makes perfect sense, because they see who you are beneath the surface and beyond today’s to-do list.

They see and love the real you. I hope they think you’re as fantastic as I do.